


Lifelong Love Letter

by orphan_account



Category: League of Legends RPF
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-12
Updated: 2017-02-11
Packaged: 2018-09-08 01:26:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8824639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Collection of scenes I wrote that didn't really turn into full fics but that I was too attached to to not do something with. Exceedingly fluffy, proceed with caution.





	1. When the Nights Get Long

**Author's Note:**

> If any more of these happen I'll just add them but for now I'll call this "complete."

“Can I look yet?”

“Oh yeah, my bad, I’ve been ready for the last ten minutes I just forgot you were here. Good thing you asked.”

Meteos snorts and keeps his eyes closed. He can still hear Sneaky, fabric sounds shuffling around with the occasional snap of elastic.

“I don’t fucking know how-” another snap “-anyone could wear this shit every fucking day, it’s impossible to get on.”

“You need some help?” He lilts the words with a suggestive tone.

“Nah I think it’s… pretty much good now?”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah uh. Go ahead I guess.” Sneaky’s standing awkwardly, shifting foot to foot. He’s still wearing the same threadbare white pajama shirt he’d had on before all this, funnily enough. But in place of his usual boxers is now a light blue pleated skirt, stopping just above his knees, both of which are covered in opaque black stockings all the way down to his feet. He’s gripping the hem of the skirt on both sides, fiddling with it anxiously.

“So…?” Meteos isn’t sure exactly how he’d though he would feel on seeing Sneaky in this gifted outfit firsthand. This certainly isn’t it though.

“Holy shit you’re so cute.”

Sneaky’s face flashes intense surprise before he rolls his eyes and makes to turn away. “Yeah whatever, fuck me I guess.”

Meteos springs up from the bed he’d been sitting on and crosses the room. He hugs Sneaky around his middle and pulls him back into his own chest, Sneaky feebly struggling the whole way. “Legit, babe. You’re the cutest weeb I’ve ever seen.”

Sneaky huffs and stops fighting, leans back against him. “I heard Jessica Nigri said she was a weeb.”

“Who?”

“You know, that chick with the huge-”

“I literally could not give less of a shit about that right now.” Meteos pillows his cheek on top of Sneaky’s head, the way they both know Sneaky secretly loves and outwardly hates. The two of them sway lightly together. Meteos hums contently.

“You wanna go back to bed?”

“Yeah, okay.”

“With the skirt too?”

“Mm. Maybe some other time.”


	2. Take Up the Place Right Here Next to Me

“Alright, fuck marry kill.”

Sneaky nearly spits out his mouthful of burrito. Meteos, sitting on their couch beside him eating one of his own, looks infinitely amused, like that had been his plan all along.

“Go on?”

“Okay, so. Think hard about this one. Will Hartman, Meteos, and me.”

He’s carefully schooling his face expressionless and Sneaky looks back at him trying to do the same. He hums loudly in a show of deliberation.

“Well, first, kill Will for sure, that guy sounds like an asshole.”

Meteos nods amicably, fighting back a twitching smile.

“Then, uh. I guess fuck Meteos? Like, he’s pretty good at League, maybe he’ll boost me, right? Or like, host my stream or something.”

Meteos snorts. “Ah, yeah, makes sense, good thinking.”

“So then that leaves marry you.” There’s an awkward pause that Sneaky rushes to fill. “If that’s alright?”

“Yeah, just-” Meteos shuffles around with something. “No take backs.” Sneaky tilts his head, ready to question his boyfriend a bit further, but before he can, Meteos places a small box on his knee.

Sneaky stares at it incredulously. The world seems to stop for that moment.

“Are you. Are you fucking serious right now.”

Meteos looks a bit panicked.

“I mean. If you think it’s a bad idea or like it’s the wrong time or whatever that’s fine I can-”

“THIS is your fucking proposal??”

Meteos stops dead when he sees the grin on Sneaky’s face.

“OH, I’m sorry, what was I thinking, I forgot you’re a goddamn princess.” Meteos snatches the little box back while Sneaky cackles. “Should have known better, you only like me on my knees anyway.”

He slides off the couch and onto one knee, the perfect picture of a proposal, and despite all the teasing that’s come before, Sneaky still feels like his heart skips a beat at the sight.

“Zachary Scuderi-”

“Who the fuck is that.”

Meteos huffs. “Sneaky fucking Castro-”

“Nonono-”

“YOU, okay?”

“Yeees?” Sneaky plants his hands on his knees primly.

“You. I…” Meteos drops his facade, looking to be gathering his words carefully. “You are. The best person I’ve ever met. And you make ME a better person every day I’m with you, you know? You understand me, and you care about me like no one ever has, and I just want to give that back to you for the rest of my life. So. Will you marry me?”

Sneaky finds himself choked up by the end of the speech, throat so tight he’s not even sure how he’s able to open his mouth and croak out a “yes.”

Meteos beams at him, lit up with the kind of joy that looks like he might cry, and honestly Sneaky’s right there with him.

“Can I put it on you?” Sneaky laughs shakily and holds out a hand with dainty flourish. Meteos frowns and looks side to side.

“…Is that the right hand?”

“My right or your right?”

“No, I mean, is that the right hand, the hand engagement rings go on?”

“Oh.” Sneaky looks at both his hands carefully, spread out in front of him, as though that could jog some deeper knowledge of the intricacies of etiquette.

“I think it’s… my left?”

“Hm. We could make it a cock ring if you’re not sure. Actually, that might just be better.”

“No hang on, just put it on here, I have an idea.” Sneaky flaps his left hand around until Meteos catches it and slides the ring on carefully.

It’s understated as far as engagement rings go, a thick silver band with three small diamonds set lengthwise. Sneaky feels genuine surprise at how much it seems to suit him.

“You should have seen the lady at the store.” Meteos grins widely. “I told her it was for my boyfriend and she went crazy, like, I guess they have a bunch of dude rings no one ever even looks at or something, she was hyped as fuck.”

“Really? Yeah, I’ll go see, I need to get you one as well, right?” Sneaky replies absentmindedly as he pulls out his phone and sets up a picture of his newly adorned hand beside Meteos’ head.

“Make like, a confused face.” He pulls the dumbest face imaginable and Sneaky snaps the photo with a laugh.

Meteos climbs back on the couch and scoots close enough to read over Sneaky’s shoulder as he types out a tweet.

 

_We’re not sure which hand this goes on :( Is this right??_

 

“Good?” Meteos hums an affirmative and Sneaky sends it off quickly.

“I like it, very possessive. Let everybody know you’re off the market.”

Sneaky leans into him, pressed together comfortably, shoulder to shoulder.

“Eh. I already was.”


	3. Fraternizing With The Enemy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Harry Potter AU. no one flame me for my headcanons okay... i swear to god... please...

A chorus of small clicks sound very near Zach’s head. A pair of first years across the common room shriek in terror. Zach looks up with a sigh.

A large, ethereal spider looks back down at him and tilts her head curiously. She’s much fluffier than usual today.

Zach sighs again. “What’s up?”

The near human sized spider opens her mandibles and speaks with his boyfriend’s voice.

“1v1 me on the quidditch pitch 10 minutes.”

And with that she scurries off, through the walls of the room itself, much to the distress of the newer students, though anyone present for the last term is used to it by now. In their sixth year, when relaying messages by patronus had first been taught, for a week the corridors were filled to the brim with a menagerie of ghostly animals running back and forth throughout the castle. The fad had quickly died down though, with most students agreeing the practice was just too magically and emotionally taxing when an enchanted paper airplane could get the job done just as well.

Will, though, had stayed enamored with the charm. He had a natural affinity for it, he said. Or maybe he just enjoyed the possibilities that being able to summon a giant spectral spider to carry out his every whim afforded him. Either way, she’d become a permanent fixture of the castle, often seen scuttling across walls and ceilings in a highly disconcerting way, nearly always on her way to track Zach down with some inane bullshit.

Speaking of which. Will fucking KNOWS they can’t play and yet he hadn’t asked her to take a message back. Asshole.

Zach pulls out his wand and casts the charm, as he thinks back to a cold night made warmer by a shared fireplace. A small rat bounds from his wand and circles around to look up at him. He bends down to it.

“Go tell Will: ‘I think the pitch might be a little too crowded. Dumbass.’” And with that his patronus sails off, in the same direction Zach himself is headed with his bag full of equipment, to the first quidditch match of the season being held in half an hour.

When he reaches the locker room, he’s greeted by more than one familiar face. Will is sat on a bench, happily rubbing the traitorous rat behind an ear as it squeaks its affection. Zach dispells it quickly.

“Wow, rude. Jealous of your own patronus? That’s fucked up dude, no wonder he looks so shitty today.”

“What about forgetting your own boyfriend’s very important match, huh? That’s gotta be way worse.”

“Oh yeah, **_I_ ** forgot, for sure, definitely, that’s why I made this.”

He brandishes a large poster that Zach had somehow failed to notice earlier. It’s an image of a snake and a badger, charmed to motion and engaged in an indecipherable act that’s still somehow blatantly sexual.

Zach scoffs. “You’re never gonna get that past the professors.”

“Underestimating me yet again!” Will taps the board with his wand, and it shimmers for a moment before blanking to pure white with black letters spelling out “I JUST HOPE BOTH TEAMS HAVE FUN” in a sloppy font.

“See? Completely innocent, no one will suspect a thing.”

Zach can’t help breaking down laughing. Another member of the Slytherin team clears his throat pointedly behind the two of them.

“Ah shit, I gotta get ready. See you out there, you’re cheering for me right?”

“I mean. You’re playing against my house.”

Zach cracks a shit eating grin. “So?”

Will rolls his eyes. “Yeah, I’m cheering for you.”

“Where’s my good luck then?” Zach simpers. The members of his team within earshot all groan in unison and beginning quickly filing out.

Will snorts. “Ah, oops, almost forgot.” He leans in just far enough that Zach can pull him down into a soft kiss.

After more time than they really should have, Zach breaks the kiss and lingers fondly for a moment before remembering something.

“Wait, what the fuck is wrong with my patronus?”

Will shrugs. “I dunno, something’s off with him. Looks weird. Like he’s sick or something.”

“What? That can’t happen can it-”

“Get him the fuck out of here! What the fuck?” His captain screeches. Zach turns around sheepishly as Will collects his shit and hightails it out of the lockers.

Hai shakes his head. “I swear to god, Zach. I know you’re good at potions but you’ve overdosed that kid.”

Zach flips him off while simultaneously changing into his uniform. He’s sure it looks as awkward as it feels.

Hai continues. “You know love potions are illegal though, right?”

“Hm, the only way someone could love me is if I was drugging them, thanks coach, great pep talk.”

“Yeah well, you missed the real one to make out with some dumbass, so that’s all I’ve got left. Now hurry the fuck up or you’re benched for real this time.”

“You’re just jealous~” Zach sing songs after him.

“Yeah I know!” Hai echoes down the hall.

 

\---

A ghostly rat floats down onto his chest. He cracks an eye open and groans. “What is it?”

It opens its mouth and speaks with his husband’s voice.

“Wake the fuck up already. Also, what do your sisters want for Christmas?”

The patronus then pointedly drifts away without accepting a response. Zach groans louder and fumbles around for his wand. He speaks the charm as he remembers the first time he’d conjured her instead. A large wispy spider fills their bedroom.

“Tell Will ‘Fuck you.’”


	4. Lost If I Lost You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey folks, this is a crime. It's a crime fic and a bad thing and you shouldn't view it. 
> 
> Speaking seriously now, it's a homestuck AU and you can view the context here: http://jununy.tumblr.com/post/156823393768
> 
> But really, don't read it, you're better off. Don't read homestuck either.

The ocean is murky in an odd way in the moonlight, the ripples reflecting darkly. Like you could see everything below the surface perfectly if you could only focus properly, or maybe if you just dunked your head in. You wouldn’t catch Meteos dead alone in the water though. Or, more like, if he were alone in the water, the only way you’d catch him was dead. Eaten alive by any number of unspeakable horrors and/or terrors that are only ever held at bay by exactly one person. One person that’s conspicuously absent at their usual meetup time. Meteos chucks another rock in. Maybe it’ll hit the dumbass on the head and wake him up. Or maybe it’ll call up a giant kraken to bite his own head clean off. Either would be fine at this point.

Suddenly, a menacing splash sounds just out of his periphery and has him scrambling to his feet, grabbing up his gauntlets to at least try to put up a fight against bloodthirsty sea creatures. Instead, he finds a pair of asymmetrical horns sticking out of the water, above two very amused eyes, shining brightly in the dark.

Meteos drops his gauntlets and sits back down with a sigh. “You know you don’t have to try to scare me every time?”

Sneaky floats over to the dock Meteos is sat on and heaves himself up deftly. “Nah dude, dunno what you’re talking about, I’m just swimming. Maybe you should try it sometime.” The innocent grin on his face begs for confrontation. The gills on either side fan themselves adorably. Meteos feels something in him soften against his will at the sight. The little shit is absolutely impossible to be mad at.

“Yeah, I’m not sure swimming would turn out so hot for me, think I’m a little too yellow for that.”

Sneaky cocks his head. “So?”

“So, I’m a bit lacking in the fancy underwater tech.” He wiggles his fingers in his own approximation of gills. “I’d drown.”

Sneaky slings an arm around Meteos’ shoulder and pulls them together. “Nonono, I’d never let my big bad ocean get you, my grub.”

Hot blood fills Meteos’ face, flushing him some ugly color of mustard mixed with grey. He shrugs it off with a cough and gestures back to Sneaky.

“Wait, where’s your, uh-” He positions his hands like he’s firing the large ornate rifle Sneaky always brings along with him on their ‘hunting trips.’

“Oh, we don’t need it today, she’s asleep.” He leans back on his hands looking supremely content.

Meteos stares back at him blankly. “She’s- your lusus, the terror of our planet that threatens to murder our entire race on a whim if we don’t cater to its every need?”

“Yeeeees~”

“It’s asleep.”

“Yes sir.”

“What the fuck?”

“I don’t know dude, but it’s fucking sick not having all that bullshit going nonstop for once.”

 Meteos hums, fiddling with his gloves. “So, uh. What did you wanna do then?”

 Sneaky shrugs. “I thought we could just hang out? Go back to your hive and play games or something?”

 Meteos fakes a swoon. “Oh my, Mister Castro, trying to get back to my hive on the first date! How scandalous!”

“SHUT the fuck up.” Sneaky shoves him with a laugh. “First fucking date my ass.”

“First date that doesn’t involve lusus murder.”

“Hang on, we don’t know that yet.”

Meteos gasps and clutches his chest dramatically. “You’re not getting my lusus you fucker.”

Sneaky’s eyes light up. “Oh, holy shit I wanna meet your lusus. Legit the first one I’ll ever see doing its fucking job right.”

An awkward pause stretches. “Well. About that.”

\---

“So, this is Charlie.”

Sneaky keeps staring down at the small white furball. He wags his tail back at him.

“See look dude, he likes you!”

“Uh. Thank you, Charlie?”

The lusus doesn’t appear to react.

“He doesn’t really like, talk or anything like that, he’s more kinda just chill y’know?”

“...Hm.”

Meteos picks up the barkbeast and cradles him to his chest as if to fend off his matesprit’s scorn.

“So what does he… do.”

“I don’t know, we just hang out! Not every lusus can be a giant tentacle monster, my fucking bad!”

“But aren’t they supposed to like. Take care of you?”

Meteos presses his cheek into Charlie’s fur. He remains oblivious. “He does take care of me! Just, like. Emotionally.” Meteos glances back up. “You two have that in common.”

Sneaky blushes his pretty pink before flipping him a middle finger.  



End file.
